Aliveandrunning April 26 2014

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We finally tracked down a photo of my son Nick, (who did his first Cambridge parkrun last week)  on Flickr, courtesy of Bruce Grimley. Nick’s the one on the right of the picture, of course. The chap leading is my chum Maurice who has  a happy disposition when running unlike my own photo which catches me with an expression between extreme constipation and utter desolation. I have tried to smile for the camera occasionally but usually look like I’m deranged. In my head I’m more akin to the young  Clint Eastwood or Paul Newman or even Brad Pitt, gliding along with a cool detachment and causing less stylish runners to jump into ditches lest they impede my progress.

Today’s Cambridge parkrun was slow but I ran with a cold so I wasn’t displeased. Tomorrow, I’ll be doing the Ickworth 10k just outside of Bury St. Edmunds, Suffolk with loads of friends and acquaintances and Lorna will be taking pictures. My arch rivals will lord it over me because I’m not fully fit but no matter. I will arise like the phoenix from the ashes next weekend when I’m doing four races ( 2 x 5k, 1 x4.5 miles and 1 x 10k).

Very well done to son Dan who came third out of nearly 200 at Valentines parkrun in East London. I came 165th out of  405. How the mighty have fallen. Once I was a young running god and drank ambrosia from Waitrose. Now it’s tap water (although I sometimes indulge in a little tea ritual but that’s another story).

Just time for a couple of rants. I’m feeling increasingly sorry for the check out staff in my local Tesco who obviously have to follow a tight script with each customer. They are now obliged to thank customers for waiting if there is more than one in the line irrespective of how long the wait is, even if it’s only a few minutes. The other day the security guard caught my eye as I left and said “Thank you”. For what? Not shoplifting? Not starting a brawl? I’ve managed to stop myself screaming hysterically when a (usually young) checkout person implores me to “have a nice day” but it’s only a matter of time before I succumb. I’ve begun to long for the days when staff avoided eye contact and said nothing or were even surly. I tend to chose the oldest check out people because they frequently go off script and sometimes moan. How refreshing!

Pope Francis is due to canonise John Paul 11 tomorrow in St. Mark’s Square, Rome. Is this one of the Popes who successfully ignored the growing sex abuse issues concerning it’s own priests, took no remedial action, allowed them to carry on abusing children in other dioceses and effectively put the interests of the Catholic Church before the interests of the victims. I listened to an apologist speak on BBC Radio 4 (Saturday PM). He spoke about John Paul’s piety and holiness and instanced his assistance in overthrowing Communism and inspiration of young people to be Christians. How credulous people are! He was CEO of a ruthless, self serving organisation devoted to it’s own ends and wealth but obliged  to maintain the fiction of having the ultimate moral compass. Just like the pharmaceuticals and armaments industries but with added divine pretentions.