Grumpiness

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Aliveandrunning Janathon January 13

Day 13. A short run of 2 miles a day should be achievable for most Janathon runners, if they are sufficiently motivated. It doesn’t take long and you have the option of before or after work. I might add that a run after you reach home in the evening is an excellent way to wind down and begin to relax your body. Of course, when I was in paid employment, I seldom managed to go running in the evening but it’s a nice standard to apply to others.

An uneventful 2 mile run just before dusk. It was a cold and sunny day. I should have run sooner but I was busy fixing old clay pantiles to my garage roof. I did this successfully and also fixed some guttering so I had a small but perfect sense of achievement when I set out. Tomorrow I’ll be road running in Cambridge, in the evening, with the club.

I’m very confused concerning the reports I’ve read about the amount of running undertaken and the effect on the heart. In the Observer Tech Monthly yesterday, part of an article by Catherine de Lange entitled What Science Says About The benefits Of Running (not available for sharing) discussed running and repeated the same evidence I have heard on other occasions. A study of 20,000 people in Denmark over years found that those who ran lived on average for 6 years longer than those who did not. The biggest benefits came from running between on hour and two and a half hours a week, over two or three sessions, at a comfortable pace. There is speculation that long periods of vigorous physical activity, over an hour or two, puts too much strain on heart muscle, causing it to stretch and tear, which – over years – can lead to stiffening and scarring. One 2011 study found higher levels of fibrosis, or scarring, in the heart muscle of competitive endurance athletes aged 50 or over, compared to others of the same age. It  suggests moderate intensity running in small doses – of about 30 to 50 minutes at a time. Some argue that excessive running  can cause increased calcium plaque build up in the heart, which increases the risk of coronary heart disease.

I had my heart attack 4 months after running the London Marathon, aged 58. I don’t believe that my running regime, before marathon training, contributed to heart disease. I’m well aware of factors that almost certainly did and over many years. I think my level of fitness helped me to recover quickly and allowed me to return to my prior running ability. I could physically do a marathon again and I would enjoy the challenge but I do think it would be asking too much of my heart, given I have established heart disease. OK, no more marathons then. I can live with that (no pun intended) but what about half marathons which would still exceed recommended running levels? I currently run about 3 hours a week. If I do a half marathon, the training will increase for a period of time? Is this OK for me or risky? I don’t know. How about asking a cardiologist? Well, apart from an out patient appointment after discharge from hospital, you never see a cardiologist again. You are prescribed NICE  guideline cardiac medication and are monitored by your GP. There’s not deemed to be a problem if you don’t experience troublesome symptoms. I may give the cardiac rehab nurses  or sports scientist a ring.They provided an excellent 12 week rehab programme after my heart attack and work closely with the cardiologists. It would be good to speak to other runners who have heart problems and hear what advice they have been given concerning mileage and duration.

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Aliveandrunning Janathon January 11

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Day 11. From this to that! The post race snap of my new trail shoes doesn’t really do justice to the mud love-in that took place at Wimpole Estate 1st anniversary parkrun today. And, unbelievably, I didn’t win it, thanks to the 72 people that barged in front of me. To put it another way, if those 72 people had stayed in bed rather than get up for a 9 am start race, I would have been covered in glory as well as mud.

It was a glorious day. A blue sky, low, very bright sun ( I accept the sun is generally bright in a cloudless sky: it just seemed extra bright today) and a little too cold for me but manageable. 207 finished, the first coming in at 19 minutes 13 seconds and the last recorded at 55 minutes 28 seconds. That’s the thing about parkrun; it’s completely inclusive (with the proviso that you are able to run or walk). As for the conditions underfoot, we started off on a puddle and soil infested asphalt path and then transferred to marshland, swamp, morass, bog and finally quagmire in that order. However, I was impressed by the quality of the mud. It was runner friendly, forgiving, light hearted. It had a certain je ne sais quoi unlike the evil mud at Hinchingbrooke on New Years Day which tried to drown me.

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Me running past Wimpole Hall and with my daughter Isobelle who also took part. My son Dan ran Valentine’s Park 5K and got a personal best on fast, flat paths. Lorna took some great photos and we met up with a load of friends. A very enjoyable morning. The only sour note? Their second hand bookshop (previously loved and treasured then abandoned books) was not open before 11 am and we left at 10.45. OK, I can deal with it.

I felt tired when I sat down in the afternoon and started to doze. The sun shone and the temperature had risen a little higher so I went for another run lasting around 45 minutes. Much more alert after I returned. Note to self : when exhausted run for an hour plus.

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Aliveandrunning December 30

Yes, I ran for 46 minutes and 53 seconds yesterday. I ran to the river but not along it. At the point I turn around, I touch a railing as the river footpath rises onto a bridge. Failure to touch the railing would result in me falling into an alternative dimension where running is illegal and everyone has to consume a gallon of corn syrup each week by law to ensure good health. Naturally the BBC is regarded as a terrorist organisation. So you see, I have to touch the railing or I am imperilled. On the return journey, nobody gave me a friendly acknowledgement but a robin hitched a lift on my shoulder for 700 metres and gave me the latest ornithological news. He also recommended adding worms to my diet for “balance.”  “No,” I gasped,”that’s strictly for the birds.” He flew off with in a huff.

Pedestrian observation : I’ve eaten too much over Christmas and unhealthy food to boot. How to make reparations ? Shall I order a hair shirt on line or indulge in a bit of verbal flagellation ? No ! I’ll eat less and return to a healthily discriminating diet. And I will up the running until I reach such a peak of fitness and performance, it causes Usain Bolt and Mo Farah to look anxiously over their shoulders. Tomorrow I am doing the Ely New Years Eve 10K. Unfortunately the weather prospects are grim – no sun but plenty of rain, wind and cold. These conditions are not conducive for a comfortable run. I’ll do my best and explain to hundreds of my fans lining the course, that I am a below par running god now regaining his fitness. This will be received as shocking news given their belief I was infallible.

I read in the Murdoch owned Sunday Times yesterday that the World Health Organisation (WHO) is considering halving the recommended sugar consumption people should have in their diets. This is following increasing numbers of studies which conclude that sugar plays a major part in obesity and heart disease. The article predicts, predictably, “a robust response from the multi-billion pond food and drinks industry.” The manner in which our food and diet has been degraded for financial and commercial reasons  over past decades is truly shocking. Your degree of shock and awe is usually proportionate to how much interest you have shown in how food is sourced, grown and manufactured which for the large majority of people is zero. The mindset and conduct of the food and drinks industry is unlikely to be radically different to the tobacco, alcohol, armaments and pharmaceutical industries in successfully pulling the wool over our eyes. As I write, the TV sound is off but I looked up to see Rock Hudson and Patrick McGoohan each lighting up a cigarette in Ice Station Zebra (1968). It could have been worse. At least they weren’t munching Krispy Kreme doughnuts on screen.

Egregiously, I saw a Krispy Kreme delivery lorry outside my local Tesco store. I shot the driver a withering glance and my upper lip curled up in the manner of Clint Eastwood showing contempt for bad persons in the Dollar films. It had no noticeable effect because the delivery person carried on taking this dangerous foodstuff into the store. In hindsight the reason for this may have been I was 150 metres away when I executed these devastating facial movements. Must try harder.

I’ve had a few ideas about  the development of a new cult/religion. I really like the concept of karma and reincarnation. I think this idea has legs. What about MuchBetterNextTime.com ? For a fixed yearly subscription, my personal self serving  registered charity/cult/church would guarantee a return to this world in greatly enhanced circumstances compared to your previous life. No- quibble money back if not fully satisfied. How do subscribers attain this goal ? They embark on a policy of tolerance, generosity, kindness and acceptance towards others even if they wear strange clothes and live in other countries. I’ll produce the guidance and develop lots of esoteric waffle, they pay their subscriptions and accrue the benefits in this life and the next. It’s a win-win situation. I’ll also make them start running.

 

 

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Aliveandrunning December 28

200th parkrun at Cambridge today and I have run 148 of them plus another 10 at Wimpole Estate. The weather was fine – sunny and not too cold – but muddy in many places. My arch rival, Mike, was marshaling which left me competing with No. 2 arch rival Diane. As usual I could hardly contain myself. I felt like a rocket in a silo waiting for the FIRE button to be pressed, I was a torpedo restless in its tube. Someone said go and I took off like a particle whizzing around the CERN Large Hadron Collider. Knocking people aside without pity, I broke free from the pack and took on the mantle of front runner only to have my dream shattered. The race had not started yet. I was a highly strung thoroughbred and when a couple having a conversation near me included the word GO I responded instinctively. Boy, was there a copious amount of egg on my face ! Ashen visaged, I apologised to my fellow runners whom I had pushed into a ditch or into muddy puddles and retook my position farther back as a penance. It didn’t go very well. No. 2 arch rival Diane overtook me around half way and I had no gas left in the tank to catch her up. I was startled when a very small child went past me. I’m sure I’ve seen larger tadpoles ! As is the nature of small, young fast children, they suddenly speed up then dramatically slow up, simultaneously weaving from side to side and repeating this strategy. It’s hilarious if you are limited  to running responsibly as a grown up (unless you succeed in getting tripped up). After cutting me up several times, he took off and I was history. He probably complained to the run director that too many old people are cramping his style. Lovely run despite coming 135th out of a field of 336.

Tomorrow I hope to do a 45-60 minute run and on New Years Eve I’ve got a 10 K. Possibly on New Years Day I might be doing one or two differently convened parkruns. As I write this it does seem a tad excessive (for me). It will definitely blow out the tubes and hopefully get me running longer and more frequently again.

Cambridge parkrun is held in Milton Country Park to the north of the city. The course is mainly grass and trail with some narrow paths. I’m sure the trees are closing in at various points. Quite a lot of them look surly and resentful  as we pass by. I’m convinced they’re not happy with the  resultant pounding of over 300 pairs of feet every week. I’ll try to speak to the wood nymphs and reach an accommodation. I saw  Spielberg’s Poltergeist and I don’t want to be plucked off the run path by a malevolent maple.

Alan Turing has been given a posthumous pardon for his conviction following homosexual activity. He committed suicide after being required to undergo  “chemical castration”- experimental hormone therapy to dampen down homosexual urges. The type of work he had been allowed to undertake subsequently was limited because of the supposed risk to security linked to his sexual orientation. There’s plenty of criticism to the pardon under a Royal Prerogative of Mercy which notes he was convicted under due process of the current laws in 1952. Some people argue it’s unfair on the thousands of ordinary, consenting gay men who were convicted under the same laws whose convictions still hold. My view is that all men (and women, if any) who were sentenced under these vicious “moral” laws should be pardoned. Moral panics, and particularly those of a sexual nature, may last for decades or centuries or even become embedded into the culture. In kinder and more enlightened times, I feel it is very important to revisit those nasty, ignorant and bigoted laws and expose their cruelty rather than merely state they were a product of their times. Alan Turing , along with many others at Bletchley Park, shortened the war and saved thousands of lives. The “laws” he transgressed had no right to be laws of the land and contained no justice, only sexual fear and prejudice.

New Year resolutions :

1. Research science fiction literature over last 100 years with view to developing a cult/religion.

2.Consider options to monetise said cult/religion.

3. Complete Janathon (run and blog daily) for month of January.

4. Keep an eye on Pope Francis!

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Aliveandrunning2013 December 16

They say parkrun is a social run not a race. 5K of friendly jogging and enjoying the company of like minded buddies. WRONG !! It’s a matter of life and death. Probably more important than life and death. Survival and glory are the only objectives. I see myself as Charlton Heston in the final chariot race in Ben Hur forcing my way through a course of spilled  blood and guts and bodies. I am the good guy but it’s my chariot with the protruding metal spindles that wreck the wheels of competitors causing them to crash spectacularly. 283 runners took part last Saturday. Only the fittest survived and I don’t mind admitting I had blood on my hands when it was all over. How did I do ? A massive 2 seconds faster than last week. I regard that as a huge margin when you compare it to the Big Bang which created the Universe in less than 1 second about 13.7 billion years ago. My arch rival Mike beat me by a minute. I’m fairly sure he takes a short cut when I’m distracted pushing obstructive children out of my way and into the nettles. Perhaps I should request an urgent steward’s inquiry or contact the media. Another 3 seconds faster and I would have dropped below 24 minutes. I can’t seem to do this at the moment. I note that a man in the 60 to 64 age range ran it in 21 minutes 10 seconds. What sorcery is this ? That’s obviously too fast for a social run and he should have been disqualified. My only consolation was that I beat another arch rival, Diane, by 3 seconds (Big Bang times 3) who complained of “tiredness.”

Am I taking it too seriously? Is it unrealistic to harbour a hope that I will, one day,beat the hundred or so runners in front of me and cross the line first ? Should I join the Flat Earth Society ? Am I just an “amiable loafer” as Lorna has described me ? Sounds like a good domain name!

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Aliveandrunning2013 December 11

I continue to run but I have mislaid the Winged Sandals given to me on loan by the Greek god Hermes. I’m not flying along effortlessly and I can no longer kid myself that it’s still late summer. A 45 minute run a couple of days ago was a lacklustre affair and drew no comments from passersby like “Wow, you strongly remind me of Usain Bolt” and “There goes a top class runner we are proud to have living in the Cambridge area.” I missed an outing with the club yesterday and instead heard Ian Rankin. UK crime writer interviewed in a rather lovely church in central Cambridge. See my other blog http://oscardiamond.wordpress.com/ for my very brief review and my view on Scientology following a Supreme Court ruling in London today. Scientology, you couldn’t make it up ? Or could you ?

http://www.theguardian.com/world/2013/dec/05/pope-francis-approves-panel-fight-clerical-sex-abuse The Catholic Church appears motivated to set up a high profile commission of experts to fight clerical sex abuse but, as explained in this article and another the previous day, the Vatican has refused to give a United Nations panel information it requested on clerical sexual abuse. Additionally there is still no clear plan to examine the issue of bishops’ accountability in clergy abuse cases. You would assume that a religious organisation that has caused, and allowed to continue, so much harm would be highly motivated to make whatever amends it could. Unless that organisation was so thoroughly self serving and saturated with hubris that it decided to continue to minimise the impact of abuse and make an industry out of lip service and crocodile tears.

I have a cunning plan to encourage myself to be more sociable. I will invite more people to come around for coffee or (in exceptional cases where the person is very discerning) lapsang souchong. At the point of invitation I will give them a card stating the maximum length of time they may stay eg I hour, 2 hours, 3 hours etc. They know where they stand and the whole thing has a nice manageable feel for all participants. It also gives a chance for people to increase their favour with me and receive subsequent cards of longer duration. It can’t fail.

 

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Aliveandrunning2013 December 7

I’m struggling to regain my running form after my calf strain in October/November. I haven’t been doing longish training runs and my running week seems to have lost its rhythm. The barometer of success is parkrun. Not only have I failed to beat my arch rival Mike but I am being outpaced by runners who are usually behind me. Woe is me! I am at least 30 SECONDS off my normal pace for a 5K race. That’s a very long time compared with the Big Bang and the creation of the Universe 13.7 billion years ago. On the other hand it’s no time at all if you believe God did the hard work in 6 days. Time to employ a cunning plan to return to form and mop up those superfluous seconds.

The miracle of Nelson Mandela and his associates. White South Africans escaped the retribution they might have expected after decades of cruelty, murder, destruction of human rights, extreme inequality and poor health care for the black majority.

Went to hear Raymond Tallis and Rowan Williams, former Archbishop of Canterbury discuss the issues concerning Science and Religion. It took place at Heffers bookshop in central Cambridge after the shop had closed. Heffers is a large general and academic bookshop and puts on regular literary events. This was the first event we had attended. There was a strong sense of being in a wonderful environment where you only had to reach out to touch a book, even when you were sitting down listening to the speakers. All manner of naughty thoughts ran through my mind. I fancied I co-owned the entire shop (I don’t mind sharing books with others), I considered moving in and I pondered Lorna’s reaction if I bought thousands of pounds of books (helpfully the shop was still open for purchases following the talk (which we enjoyed). Being a disciplined sort of chap, I pulled myself together and left quietly without causing a scene.

Into Cambridge again this afternoon. We meant to go to the “bohemian” Mill Road Winter Fayre today but didn’t get any further than a clutch of charity shops 15 minutes walk away. The large Oxfam shop has an excellent book section but their staff have a serious attitude problem. Because I have more than enough books at home I selflessly decided to browse rather than make a purchase. As I made my way out, empty handed, a sales assistant barred my way and declared I wasn’t permitted  to leave without buying several books. I looked at him incredulously and laughed in his face. Attempting to push past him at least six of his colleagues suddenly appeared out of nowhere and I instinctively knew that my high minded decision not buy anything was doomed. I finally capitulated when someone flicked my earlobe and suggested I was “frightened of books.” I chose four items, resentfully, paid up quickly and stormed out, my dignity in tatters. I won’t be going back there, thank you very much. at least until next week. I really hope their attitude improves but I suspect not.

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Aliveandrunning2013 November 28

I’m just starting to get back to longer weekday runs. It’s still an effort though The dull weather is dulling my mind and motivation. I can’t wait for the return of sunny weather and my sunny disposition. Only four more months until the Spring. Mmm….I think I’ll curl up here under all these Guardian newspapers conveniently hoarded by me and hibernate until the climate is more conducive…..zzzzzzzzzzzzz.

By contrast, running in the dark is fun and exciting. I rarely go running at night alone but in the Autumn and Winter I’m out with the club in and around  the streets of Cambridge. Two evenings ago we did a mixed ability four person relay (curtailed because of too much standing around ) and a paarlauf (where you have teams of paired runners and one rests while the other runs). It’s like a relay. Regard me as easily pleased but it’s quite exciting  waiting for your partner to reach you before you go sprinting off into the night. I felt like a greyhound despite being one of the slowest runners I still can’t outrun several of the seventy year olds.

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Aliveandrunning November 23

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Decided to go to Wimpole Estate parkrun today. Our 5K run takes us twice past the main house, the largest in Cambridgeshire and dating from 1640. The course takes us around the parkland and incorporates a medium short hill which is steep in parts. I have tried to run up it in the past but now I walk, or rather stride, a section because it’s quicker than a slow jog. It was very chilly and on the muddy side. I wore gloves, trackster bottoms and a heavy running jacket because I feel the cold acutely when the temperature  falls beyond a certain point. Of course some people wear shorts and vests in defiance of the cold and last year, when it fell to minus 10-11C there were still individuals wearing summer kit. The run went OK but the time was inevitably slow for me. Traction was poor and the ground was soft underfoot. I enjoyed it, however and I was only a minute outside my personal best on this course. I didn’t stop for coffee because none of my chums were there. Lorna is still a long way from starting running again and isn’t coming along to parkruns. I was therefore a lonely running god, my only audible human interaction confined to thanking the marshals at the gates. Oh how the mighty have fallen. Once I could be regularly seen sipping barista created coffee in the Wimpole restaurant, surrounded by friends and engage in light banter.Perhaps I would indulge in some limited badinage but I never stooped to persiflage. They were but distant memories today but one single, beautiful thought kept me going. The anticipation of the joy of browsing in the excellent second hand bookshop! But the Fates were against me this morning. What greater woe can a bibliophile experience than to face huge closed doors, possibly 6 metres high, barring the way into the Courtyard containing the aforesaid bookshop. In common parlance, I was too early and bookshop hadn’t opened yet. Greatly irritated, I attempted to split the oak doors asunder by using a particularly powerful glare but to no avail. Crushed in spirit, I called it a day and headed home.

Lorna had a scan on her ankle this week. She is considered to have  Achilles insertional tendonitis. It’s still swollen after 6 months and can be painful after walking even short distances. Running is out of the question. Next week we will get the results of the scan and a decision about treatment will be made. I do hope she will be back running  early next year. I  do miss running with her.

Good article in the Guardian concerning the destructive nature of the competition laws on the NHS.  http://bit.ly/1hNvh4z

The Sun newspaper has a daily circulation of 2.8 million. Big bold headlines yesterday SUICIDE MUM IS WATCHING OVER JOEY. This is a reference to Joey Essex, a young actor in a reality TV programme who is currently a contestant in another reality TV programme called I’m a Celebrity….Get Me Out of Here. The celebs are living in the jungle and undergo “trials” like eating insects or grubs and having various creatures crawl over them in confined spaces. The headline refers to Joey’s mother who committed suicide when he was a child. More evidence that at least 2.8 million people in the UK have switched off, or possibly permanently deleted, their critical faculties. Note to self : devise a sensor to identify Sun readers and enable me to take evasive action.

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Aliveandrunning2013 November 20

Out running with Cambridge and Coleridge  last night. As usual I took the road rather than track option. We did two 1.7 mile loops followed by a mile then a warm down jog back to the club. Slightly disappointed we didn’t do 3 loops as suggested initially but it was an enjoyable run in the dark along the mean streets of outer Cambridge. It goes without saying that I felt like a young demi-god effortlessly negotiating irritating obstacles like pedestrians, street furniture, cyclists and cold weather. A chum fell by the wayside, metaphorically speaking, by” pulling” his calf muscle. Not sure what this means exactly. I think it’s one step up from tweaking your calf. I guess it’s a calf strain again partially caused by insufficient rest following a previous strain. Runners,eh ! They just don’t know when to stop running.

Jeremy Hunt, Health Secretary, lives up to the mispronunciation  of his name by a Radio 4 news presenter some time ago. He calls for a “duty of candour” concerning medical care mistakes in hospital. the need to prevent cover ups and demonstrate much greater accountability and is requiring hospitals to reveal ward staffing levels. The  Tories are adept at demonizing or condemning practices and conduct which most people would agree is not acceptable but they are not willing to follow through and ask how these circumstances are created. The NHS is being not so gradually dismembered and given to for profit providers while cuts and unrealistic targets force managers to take shortcuts and massage figures. There are many sharp practices which don’t come to light but most of them will have arisen because budget holders are placed in impossible positions. Ever higher standards are sought with less money available and in the context of the NHS judged and evaluated as a for profit organisation.  http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/cartoon/2013/nov/19/jeremy-hunt-nhs-hospitals-steve-bell

http://www.theguardian.com/society/2013/nov/19/nhs-hospitals-penalties-mistakes-midstaffs-scandal-hunt

Interestingly, past and present police officers currently testifying before a parliamentary committee of MPs are revealing that crime statistics have been been altered to boost favourable performance for years. In practice this means some categories of serious crime such as rape, sexual abuse of children and domestic violence are not being investigated and therefore do not swell crime figures adversely. It’s a win-win situation for the police and the government who are able to report that crimes are down on their watch. The police, as well as the Government are a law unto themselves.

Inhttp://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2013/nov/19/police-failures-rape-child-abuse-official-statistics