My mate talks to a banana!


I’ve told Mike before that talking to a banana does his street cred no good at all, even a fast one. I informed him there was a Doyenne Du Comice pear and an Egremont Russet apple in the vicinity and a stem of asparagus was doing some warm up exercises but he insisted on chatting to a common banana. I don’t even know whether  he was fair trade!

This occasion was the second Hoohaah 10k of the season at Wimpole Estate. The weather was lovely, the course was excellent and loads of our friends and acquaintances were taking part. Unfortunately, I picked up a silly injury at Cambridge parkrun yesterday. Milton country park, where it’s held, is in the process of laying a new path leading to the finish straight and I trod on a sharp stone which went between the gap in the thick part of the tread. It felt like it had pierced the sole but after exclaiming “Oh bother” I soldiered on. Cut to today, despite my sole feeling bruised, I thought my metatarsals had escaped injury. Until around 8k  I felt fine with only a little foot discomfort but thereafter it quickly got very painful and I suffered the ignominy of being forced to walk/limp to the finish. To make matters worse, the banana came in 5th out of 750!


Here I am, face etched with pain, just about to limp over the finish line. Ripping off my sock expecting to find a highly visual injury with which to impress my friends, I found healthy looking, unblemished skin. Is there no justice?

This series of runs, so far, has raised over £6000 for The MindEd Trust, a mental health charity which focusses on the prevention of mental illness in young people and early intervention strategies for  those experiencing trauma. It has been set to address the woefully inadequate mental health support for young people.

Parkrun etiquette. It’s so easy to impress fellow runners. First tip : if you are a fast runner, consistently start at the back and pass slower runners at speed, particularly when the path is congested. Second tip : pal up with another runner and chat loudly in a normal voice while others are struggling around you. To enhance this behaviour, overtake at the same time. Third tip : bemoan your time to others who have done 5-15 minutes slower to you.

Cambridge parkrun has a record attendance of 534 and yesterday the field was just over 500. It’s getting very busy.


2 thoughts on “My mate talks to a banana!

  1. Poor you, no sympathy for your invisible injury🤔 When my son broke his arm, I took him to casualty where I work and I had the opportunity to look at his x Ray’s, which I found unconvincing. They insisted on putting him in plaster and referring him to orthopaedics. I thought it was a bit OTT (I thought just a sprain) and suspected them of doing it because I was a consultant. Anyway when we saw the orthopaedic surgeon a couple of days later, they took the pop off and sure enough there was lots of bruising as the bleeding from the broken bone had finally tracked it’s way up to the skin😳 So check your foot in a couple of days! Obviously it will be too late for the due amount of sympaty, but I expect that the shock of you not finishing in a top 3 position will be scorched into everyone’s memory and if you share your battle wound at the bruised stage , the more intelligent of your compatriots will put 2&2 together😉

    • Thanks for the cautionary tale. I’ll keep an eye on it but I don’t think it will need anything more than rest. Since I am such a modest chap I wouldn’t go so far as asking them to view the sole of my foot. As you suggest they should be able to divine that I am a hero simply by hobbling over the line.

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